Friday, June 08, 2007
i was going to stuffs this afternoon. i came across notebooks i kept.
i read it, kinilig, umiyak, ngumiti, at kung anu-ano pa yung naramdaman ko. ang cute pala. minahal pala kita ng sobra. a huge smile unconciously painted on the canvas of my sad face. kakatuwa. everything seemed perfect, and yah.. i could recall that i did feel perfect.. perfect, contented, and happy. i just don't know what happened.
bakit ba naging ganito..? bakit ba bigla lang tayo nagkasawaan sa isa't isa..? kung tutuusin, mahal kita ng sobra.. at alam ko mas mahal mo pa ako. i just told my friends the other day waht really happened.. why insistingly wanted to leave you.. how we got back together again for the last time.. then you left and hurt me big time.
i pretended to be ok.. yes, i was and i am ok. not until now, its just that everything sinks in right now. whats this? post-breakup syndrome..?
bakit ba naging ganito..? bakit ba bigla lang tayo nagkasawaan sa isa't isa..? kung tutuusin, mahal kita ng sobra.. at alam ko mas mahal mo pa ako.
bakit nga ba?
i found this txt message i sent to you way back when we were starting off-- "i want you to be happy, even if it means i'm not the one who's making you happy.. after all, there's more to life than me.."
shet. that hit me really hard.
we never really had the chance to clean things up. dirty fights. no clear sorry, no forgiveness, no clear story of what really happened and what we both really feel.. we didnt talk.. and we didnt even care to be friends..
"don't keep me hanging.. not knowing whats gonna happen" well, i dont know if you are, but i am.
it sucks your missing in my life.. i want you back, even it means we're just friends..
i'll end this entry with something i found in one of my notebooks: "i'll be a true angel [someday], i'll have wings and halo and dress in white thingys"
am i still your angel?
kkrriiss posted at 10:34 PM